#to uncreate you
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To Uncreate You. Chapter 1 and the synopsis
The Synopsis
After discovering that he is capable of magic, Dmitry is forced to enrol into the only magic school in Siberia that has a place even for a university graduate such as him. However, Dmitry appears to only possess destructive powers, failing to recreate his very first act of magic that brought something unusual into the world, and has to sign up for individual classes with a fellow named Valera, whose magic is prone to creating things out of nothing. Dmitry, on his arduous path to making sense of his potential, crosses ways with Egor, who is too curious about Dima and too eager to make friends with him… or something more. Meanwhile, the magic school harbours too many secrets that do not mesh well with Dmitry’s, and staying true to himself will be a challenge even with the support of new and old friends.
Chapter 1
The Zayeltsovskaya metro station was unnervingly silent when it should have been bustling with people desperate to catch the last train. The old-fashioned lamps that once had been considered futuristic barely lit the platform and its sole occupant, who was standing at the first mark indicating where a train’s door would open. It was a young man in a dark-blue parka and a nondescript black hat, his face covered with a black surgical mask only to reveal thin brows and piercing green eyes. They happened to be fixated at the screen with numbers above the train tunnel, and the red digits, indicating that it was 11.40pm, suggested that it had been twenty minutes since the latest train had passed the station. The implication made the man nervously shuffle his feet and reach for his smartphone for the umpteenth time to check if the issue had made the local news as every single inconvenience in Novosibirsk tended to do, but the outlets were silent on the matter.
A metro attendant, who had been hiding in one of the security booths, noticed the man’s singular and suspicious presence and trotted towards him, her hand in a firm grip of the black baton.
‘Young man,’ she said, slightly out of breath. ‘Remove your mask and show me your ID immediately’.
The man hesitated upon seeing that the woman had no mask herself and could easily pass “the zaraza” to him, but decided to do as she said, perhaps out of fear of getting involved with the Russian police that rarely let one go unpunished. He unpeeled the mask, exposing a meadow of freckles covering his face and sharp nose in particular, rosy cheeks, their color emphasized by those freckles, and a soft mouth twisted in subtle annoyance. The attendant might have been within her right to demand what she had done, but it did not make the situation any more pleasant. Then the man rummaged in his leather bag, which dangled dangerously close to the station’s polished mirror-like platform, and produced his maroon ID, preemptively open at his personal information page. The woman snatched it from him hungrily and started reading aloud.
‘Angarskiy Dmitry Alexandrovich, born on the 31th of December, year 2000, male. The photo appears to match face… Well, Dmitry Alexandrovich, it must be nice to have your birthday on the same day as New Year’s Eve. Now, let’s see…’
The attendant turned over the page to look at Dmitry’s place of registration, which made him tense.
‘Aha! Dmitry Alexandrovich, you live exactly above this station, so what business do you have taking the last train away from your house?’ she said triumphantly, having found exactly what she needed to apprehend the guy, at least in her dutiful mind.
Dmitry’s face tightened at the question, as it made too much sense, and nothing he could say would make the tenacious woman reconsider. He straightened himself and prepared to babble some nonsense about having a relative around the Karl Marx station (which he actually did according to his grandma, but he did not even know her name), but the salvation came in the form of a sound of someone skipping down the stairs, and the attendant’s attention immediately shifted to another phantom enemy of the state. Her adversary was a guy who was apparently undaunted by the Siberian winter, his black hair messily waving around the hatless head. His clothes looked obscenely light for the weather, and Dmitry could not help but notice that his zipper was undone, but fortunately for all of them, the jeans appeared to have enough fabric inside to cover anything indecent. Before the guy could reach the platform, the lady attendant was there at the foot of the stairs, ready to grab him, and Dmitry hastily adjusted his mask and was about to leave through the other entrance equipped with escalators. Out of nowhere, a female voice announced the arrival of the long-awaited train, and just as Dmitry was arriving at the fateful decision, the new guy whispered something into the attendant’s ear that made her look satisfied and hopped to a spot next to him. The woman remained indifferent despite such a breach of discipline and re-entered her booth, presumably to spend the rest of the night there.
‘Are you here for the school, too?’ the guy asked cheerily, his teeth too white for the gloomy station. Dmitry looked at him closer, discovering azure eyes and a curved nose with a small mole on it as well thin lips and unattended stubble that somehow complimented the handsome face. While Dmitry was bracing himself to say a simple ‘yes’, a train’s rumble became audible, and the poor fellow’s answer was completely drowned out by the vehicle’s stopping shriek. The doors opened, and both men entered an empty car, which was not surprising for the starting station in the line but still felt eerie.
Dmitry took a seat next to the door while the other guy just grabbed the horizontal iron bar and situated himself over Dmitry, clearly intent on continuing the conversation.
‘So, I didn’t hear you, are you going to the school?’ he asked again, less cheerily and less teethy.
‘Yes,’ Dmitry replied curtly through the mask, his voice distorted, not willing to engage himself in a talk with another person, not matter how charming they might be.
‘Great. I’m Egor, by the way. I had to take a bus from Rodniki and was almost late. Ugh, when are they going to build a new damn station? The third city in the whole country, and some of us still feel like we live on the outskirts,’ the guy complained in a rapid breath, his left hand mimicking his indignation.
‘Yeah,’ Dmitry managed another short reply and started reaching for his smartphone.
‘Hey, what’s your name? And you could remove that mask, I’m vaccinated, you know,’ Egor said, a hint of discontent in his voice.
‘And I’m not,’ Dmitry retorted, equally vexed.
‘Are you one of those anti-vax people? Or do you think magic will protect you from germs because that’s definitely not the case,’ the guy said patronizingly, further annoying Dmitry. He no longer looked as pleasant as the first impression had suggested.
‘That’s none of your business, and can you get off my case, please? There’s plenty of room in this car, you don’t have to stand here and waste your precious time on the likes of me,’ Dmitry said, finally getting hold of his smartphone. He took it out and started swiping his fingers aggressively over the protected surface, completely ignoring the other guy.
‘Hey, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize… You could be one of those exemption cases. Ok, I’m a dummy, but at least tell me your name, pretty please? We are going to study together, and I don’t want any bad blood between us,’ Egor said apologetically, his face awfully similar to that of a puppy.
‘Dmitry,’ he replied, not taking his eyes off the smartphone.
‘Nice to meet you,’ Egor said politely. ‘Can I call you Dima?’
‘No.’
‘Why?’
‘Because you aren’t my friend and you aren’t doing a great job of making me want to do anything with you,’ Dmitry replied exasperatedly, his fingers still spidering over the smartphone’s screen.
‘I did save you from that woman, didn’t I? I heard the commotion from the turnstiles hall and climbed down the stairs as fast as I could,’ Egor smiled, seemingly proud of himself.
Dmitry raised his eyes, the smartphone suddenly forgotten.
‘What did you tell her?’ he asked, half-curiously. ‘I doubt it was a simple “oh you look beautiful tonight.”’
‘I used some of manipulation magic, looked up the spells online. I hadn’t tried them before that little trick, but it worked, and everyone was happy,’ Egor said smugly. ‘Why didn’t you use your magic, I bet you already know a spell or two.’
‘I thought we weren’t supposed to use magic,’ Dmitry shrugged. ‘I’d rather learn first and then start casting spells around, not really knowing what they do.’
‘Sure, but this private Telegram chat I found was the real deal. I only tried some minor stuff, like how to light a candle by just looking at it. So you didn’t do any experiments at all?’
‘Nope,’ Dmitry replied. ‘Granny has some books on magic back from the USSR, but nothing I read there was really useful, and I wasn’t about to call myself a God’s slave or worse to make them work.’
‘Heh, such books are mostly bogus, trust me. So, you know anything about that school?’ Egor asked, trying to change the subject.
‘Well, it’s near my uni, judging by the address, the same street, but I never saw the building itself and I have no idea why we have to use the last train to reach it through some secret tunnel,’ Dmitry said, crossing his legs and trying not to kick Egor in the process, although the desire was more or less burning.
While they were deep in the conversation, the train kept going, making no stops during all that time. The next one was the Lenin Square station, as the female announcer had proclaimed to no one in particular.
‘Do you mean the teacher’s uni? What are you studying there?’ Egor asked, surprised.
‘I already graduated, and I wasn’t interested in doing my Masters, not that I had the money anyway. Still, they told me to wait until the next year, build up my portfolio, but with this magic thing that’s out of the window, I guess. And I was studying history… well, to be a history teacher’ Dmitry replied, suddenly talkative.
Egor’s face brightened at the success of making his previously unwilling partner-in-magic talk, and he started firing off ever more questions.
‘Teacher, huh? And history, wow. Never liked that one, but mad respect to you, bro,’ Dmitry flinched at that comment but decided not to say anything. ‘So you like teach at a public school or something? Kinda funny that you’re about to be a student again.’
‘No, I don’t work at school, basically nobody does after graduating, and don’t ask me why, I have my reasons,’ Dmitry said, brushing aside the potential comments to follow.
‘Ok, ok, so what do you do for living then? You must have a job, especially in this economy.’
‘Well, what do YOU do?’ Dmitry retorted, starting to get annoyed again. ‘I can’t be the only one spilling my guts here.’
‘I graduated from the NSU, majored in… physical informatics, I know, I know, it sounds weird, but that’s what I studied,’ Egor glanced at Dmitry, expecting laughter or derision, but the latter only raised his eyebrows at the strange name. ‘I got a job at a reputable organization, but I’m not sure if I’ll be able to juggle both the job and the magic studies, and you can’t really opt out of the magic thing once it manifests.’
Egor sounded quite regretful when he said that, and Dmitry felt a bit sorry for him despite their rocky start.
‘My so-called job is nothing to write home about, and I don’t want to say what it is because it’s shameful, but I think I’ll manage to do it together with my studies, and even if I don’t, my brother said he’d take care of the family, so…’ Dmitry trailed off, not caring that he had revealed another goldmine for Egor to dig into.
‘Oh, you have a brother? Who is he? Does he know about your gift?’ the guy inquired excitedly, accidentally removing his right hand from the iron bar and almost falling straight into Dmitry.
‘Hey, careful, curious Varvara,’ Dmitry said, not unkindly. ‘I don’t really want to talk about my brother now. It’s… complicated.’
‘You are complicated,’ said Egor with a grin. ‘Well, does he have the same eyes as you, at least? I kinda like them even though they’ve been judging me ever since we passed the Gagarinskaya station.’
‘What in the…,’ Dmitry gasped at the out-of-nowhere compliment, his masked cheeks flushed, but then a new announcement drew their attention.
‘Switching to the Oktyabrskaya line,’ an unknown male voice said, a contrast with a typical feminine announcer.
‘Oktyabrskaya line? That doesn’t exist in the city,’ Egor said with suspicion.
‘We must be approaching our destination,’ Dmitry rationalized. ‘Magic isn’t supposed to exist either.’
‘You might have a po-,’ Egor was about to concede just as the train suddenly started gaining speed, sending him flying, this time not sparing Dmitry. His head landed on Dmitry’s chest, his hands circled Dmitry’s waist, and legs met legs.
‘God, I’m so so-,’ Egor tried to apologize and raised his hand to grab the vertical bar protruding from the seat’s thin armrest, but the train jerked hard, and his fingers fell on Dmitry’s face, awkwardly moving the mask down the frustrated guy’s nose.
‘Wow, I’ve never seen so many fre-,’ he unsuccessfully tried to finish his sentence, only to be interrupted by the train’s abrupt stop. Egor was forced to the left, but not before his fingers snatched the rest of the mask from Dmitry’s face, snapping one of the straps in the process. It helplessly fell to the seat, never to be used again, and Egor finally took a good look at Dmitry’s face.
‘You know, your eyes aren’t the only good thing about you,’ he said, half-sprawled on the car’s floor.
In return, Dmitry kicked him in the shins, causing the ‘ooh’ sound, and said, his voice no longer muffled by the mask:
‘You know, your zipper’s still undone.’
He stood up, stepped over Egor’s spindly legs, completely ignoring the guy’s embarrassed face and futile attempts at concealing the hole of indecency, where one could see a hint of the underwear, and walked through the gap left by the doors into the unknown.
Read the rest of the chapters on my website: https://danceonthebrink.wordpress.com
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oh boy wait i DID just figure out how to integrate amity into the three-part fic. amity herself is still unlikely to appear but i sure can. invoke luz's admiration of her. for. bad horror purposes.
#luz who's trying to cure hunter (who she believes is dying) but trying not to make that obvious bc it pisses belos off:#does wild magic corrupt everything you resurrect or just humans. like what if maybe someday i want to resurrect a witch#wow. still gotta decide just How Bad this gets. if i follow the first chapter's impulse of 'make everything as bad as possible' then it#will be. uh. exquisitely horrific. but i'll Probably leave any hypothetical grimwalker amitys uncreated#toh#princess luz au#god i dont wanna put this in the ship maintag so it can have the triad tag instead#shitty idiot repression gang
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your oc and doc would be cute together!☺️
ive been looking at this for so long trying to find a good response and all that came to my mind is that mephisto likes short men but that would a, be a lie (yk cuz ryad, olivier, buck and erik are rather tall men and only mozzie is schmol) and b, doc‘s a short ass .
it’s hurting me i can’t think of anything funny to respond .
#he’d let doc nap on him tho prolly .#hes a nice guy nods nods#and they’re both defenders !#they’d be pals#home boys#sweet cheeses#rotten soldiers#you get what i mean ?#. i hate that i’m so uncreating rn LMAOAOOA#🦉 owl deliveries 📬
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❛ Parading around like you own the place. ❜ dream @ 1
It's the tone more than the words themselves that make the Corinthian twitch like it's been struck: Dream sounds... repulsed. Like he can't quite believe the abject failure his creation has turned out to be, the way it continues to disappoint. The nightmare's mouths twist unhappily at the sound of it. Its insides feel like ice water has been poured into them, aching with the cold. It glares back at its creator with a smile that is more of a sneer.
"My apologies, your lordship," it hisses. "Seems I forgot myself."
It had moved with ease through the throne room before: leaning against the throne itself, talking at Dream, trying to snare his attention, as if they were humans in the Waking existing as equals and not the lord of Dreams and a traitorous subject. Now it stiffens, steeling itself against Dream's disapproval, and tries (it really does try) to look like it should: polite and deferent, like any other dream. It folds its arms and doesn't lean against the throne this time, and crushes the small hope it might have had that Dream might indulge it.
It wants nothing more than to leave this place again.
#ic.#v: the original#mythboundmuses#mythboundmuses: dream#[ why are they like this. ]#[ also i love just. corinthian's internal narrative is so self-pitying and i'm like#look i get it. you want attention.#unfortunately you also want to kill people and keep blatantly disrespecting the guy who was merciful enough not to uncreate you. ]
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i think people have lost the plot on AI and instead made it into a boogeyman and gotten Reactionary
#like its treated as some Ultra Powerful Thing that can be used secretly#like to enhance scripts or whatever#but it cant do that and you KNOW it#the mere MENTION of AI makes people freak in any context#even in ones where its always been a term like NPC behavior#critical thinking is dead#you cant uncreate it anyways
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🩰🐰CIRCUMSTANCES DON'T MATTER🩰🐰
🩰You are the creator of your reality , you can uncreate or re-create everything in your reality. Your reality is malleable , your circumstances are also malleable.
🐰If you think that you have it ,the circumstances will be diminated. If you affirm that you have the thing or person you want , you can't even fathom the way your circumstances will change. Why ? Because it's the law & the law can't fail.
🩰You don't need to know how it will happen, you just need to know that it will.
🐰It's the law, IT CAN'T BE BROKEN ! IT CAN'T FAIL ! Your thoughts create . If you keep persisting, the persisted assumption must harden into a fact.
🩰When it comes to manifestation, logic doesn't matter , it's completely useless.
🐰As long as you are affirming that you have what you want & ignoring the 3D, the undesired circumstances will be eliminated & your affirmations will harden into fact.
🩰This is your world , it has no choice but to mold itself according to your assumptions.
#self concept#affirmations#law of assumption#neville goddard#loa#it girl#master manifestor#self concept affirmations#affirm and persist#assume and persist#3d reality#living in the end#persisting#persistence#sammy ingram#kim velez#edward art#loa tumblr#law of manifestation#loa blog#how to manifest#manifesting tips#circumstances dont matter#4d reality#subconscious mind#desired reality#law of the universe#thoughts create#positivity#manifest
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I just got this random idea with a SAGAU cult au with a creator who doesnt even care that they're the creator?? like-
mf be so carefree with the things happening and is so chillax with the acolytes
esp if the creator has a gen z personality, it will be one heck of a chaos.
"Your Holiness-"
"BRO- Y/N IS MY NAME."
or like
"Oh Holy One! my Savior and Blessed. The One who created this realm from scratch and pits of the endless void that was once the home of uncreated-"
"Yeaahhh... okay thats not very skibidi of you now."
creator!reader/player be so nonchalant about their role its almost concerning??
"Do you not understand the power you hold on us?" asked one of the acolytes.
"i do but likee... i no no wanna :("
"...what is 'i no no wanna?."
*Bursts out laughing*
esp also with the scary ones and the etiquette ones like Neuvi or Raiden? Creator would be so buddy buddy with them frfr
But who's to say they will deny the affection?
(≧▽≦) Aesa ! Please don't copy, translate or steal my works ! Only inspired works are allowed.
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WIP excerpt behind the cut; "Tim's free cloning lab". (( chrono || non-chrono ))
“Red Robin’s commitment issues are his own problem, not mine. I’ve got a schedule to keep,” Luthor replies dismissively, then knocks back the last of his hopefully-actually-a-protein-shake-and-not-Bane-venom-or-something and gets to his feet, picking up his tablet again as he does. He does not seem concerned to be alone in a lab full of sharp objects and computers with two only negligibly-restrained Bats. Admittedly Luthor doesn’t tend to seem concerned during literal multiversal apocalypses, but Tim is vaguely insulted on principle. A multiversal apocalypse couldn’t do any worse than uncreate Luthor and everything he’s ever done in his life, after all. He could tank his stock prices and drive up all his insurance rates, and then make him have to live with it.
A little respect isn’t that much to ask, is it?
“Wow, called out by the supervillain,” Steph mutters to him under her breath. “The Metropolis supervillain, even.”
“I do not have commitment issues,” Tim mutters back to her.
“Yes you do, the issue is you commit yourself to somebody and then become an insane person about them but never actually mention the existence of said commitment to them,” she retorts frankly.
“I do not–”
“When did you go for the red and black suit again and how long did you stick with it?”
“. . . we’re in a supervillain lair in Connecticut, I don’t have to answer that right now.”
“Oh, so you will later?”
“So anyway, new supervillain trap, how’s that going for you?” Tim asks Luthor. Steph snorts at him; he ignores her and all her baseless, ridiculous, baseless accusations that are definitely not currently reading him for absolute filth. “All coming together nicely, no tech issues? Because we could troubleshoot those for you while we’re waiting for extraction, no charge.”
“The chemical breakdown of the necessary stabilizer you missed when you were cleaning out my old labs is laid out in file B-2.13, speaking of ‘troubleshooting’,” Luthor mentions, and Tim . . . pauses.
“‘Stabilizer’,” he echoes carefully, and then glances around the sunroom lab. The sunroom cloning lab.
The sunroom.
Ah.
That is probably a connection he should've made, like . . . literally instantly, yeah.
“Oh my god, do you think you can actually convince Red Robin to make you another–wait, why do you even want Red Robin to make you another Superman or whatever, you did it better than he ever did,” Steph says, squinting in bewilderment at Luthor through her mask. Tim’s much more insulted this time, even if it’s objectively true that Kon is objectively–never mind. Luthor just looks dubious.
“I don’t want another Superman, there are already far too many of those running around and being an issue as it is,” he snorts dismissively, waving her off. “And I’m willing to provide a useful little resource or two, of course, but it’s hardly traditional to have to make my own grandchildren, now is it. Besides, Supernova won’t be as annoyed about it if they come from you. Though I did include some potential design notes for your consideration in the C folder, of course. Streamlined the tactile telekinesis a bit, for starters. It really didn’t come out as effective as intended, unfortunately.”
“Of course,” Tim echoes, perfectly aware of that one time that Kon took apart every single gun inside the exact city limits of Los Angeles and nothing else without even meaning to, and also that one time last week when he very much did mean to disassemble a bomb immediately after its trigger mechanism had been tripped, and did it so fast that it didn't detonate.
So as politely as possible, that makes Luthor’s use of the word “effective” slipped in there a little mind-numbingly terrifying to consider.
More than anything else, though, Tim really hopes that he’s just gone insane and hallucinated all this, because otherwise he’s going to have to write all this down in a report, and Steph will not lie for him about this one.
Case in point: she is currently laughing her fucking ass off at him.
#timkon#tim drake#lex luthor#stephanie brown#dc robin#dc spoiler#red robin#wip: tim's free cloning lab
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I really think it's fascinating how Castlevania Nocturne goes out of it's way to show how much the hierarchies of power that seem as permanent as the earth beneath our feet are transient, impermanent things.
The Egyptian empires which worshipped Sekhmet have long since become dust and tombs. The Aztecs are gone, even if Olrox remains. The Sun-king has lost his head to the guillotine. Plantation owners that saw children born into bondage, grow up into adults bondage, then die in bondage have found themselves on the ashpile of history. Nothing created by people cannot be uncreated by people. Annette saying to a vampire and slaver that has been ranting about her place in the natural order that the true natural order is the sun rising and devouring the darkness, right as the morning sun rises and turns him to ashes. Her teacher telling her that humanity didn't come into this world with slaves and masters, that that came later.
It's so important to the story, so pointed, especially with how the season ended. The "divine" right of kings, bolstered by a priest who sold his soul to protect his own power and coming in the form of an immortal aristocrat. They would blot out the sun before admitting that their way of things was over.
Really makes you think about other structures built by humans that are allegedly too big to ever destroy. How true is that really?
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3d is not proof of anything
You can tell me that you have no money, and I will ask to you, "how do you know you don't have money?" and maybe you will tell me "I just checked my bank account, I have no money".
But are you checking your bank account right now? No, you are not. Then you are imagining it, assuming that you don't have it.
Knowing Imagination creates reality, and that what you assume and identify as real is reflected, why you sustain limitations and lack in your mind?
You can Imagine and assume anything that you want. Do you want to be poor? I bet you not. Then free yourself in your mind to FEEL what you WANT to feel. REMOVE THE OUTER WORLD CIRCUMSTANCES. You are not forced to unknowlegde what you see with your mortal eyes as real, you can ignore and rewrite the history as you want it to be.
Now let me tell you, the whole world is imagined. Nothing you see with your mortal eyes is a fixed fact.
"If I can make something, I can unmake it. Whatever I can create, I can uncreate." NG
How can I create and uncreate? I dismiss what my senses tell me and I decide to be aware of what I want, knowing it is mine, I experience it. I cannot fail.
Don't take your circumstances to the mind, they are not real. You don't need to fight circumstances, that's not your business, they will be removed as you assume the end.
So if you see something in your world that you don't like, leave the world alone and change Self. Self is everything you identify yourself as being or having!
The confirmation that you have what you believe you have is in your Imagination, it NEVER was in the outerworld. You were always assuming that you had things, now you just assume you have things that you WANT.
If you still believe in what the senses shows you, you are not yet conviced that Imagination creates reality, not the other way around. When you believe it, you will know you are the master of your fate.
Don't sleep again, never forget this truth.
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To Uncreate You. Chapter 14. Part 2
They talked about many things after the make-out session. Dmitry was surprised to learn that Egor shared his taste in obscure anime series and not-so-popular Nintendo games. Egor also shared that he could cook, to which Dmitry joked that he would be the one to do the cooking, not specifying what he meant in particular. Dmitry told Egor about his brother and the magic that had manifested him, and Egor kept fishing for more details.
‘Why are you so curious about this?’ Dmitry laughed, limply punching Egor in the right pec. ‘I told you I can’t make another one. You can’t have fun with two of me.’
‘Shut up,’ Egor sealed Dmitry’s lips with his fingers. ‘That’s not why I’m asking, but thanks for planting the idea in my head.’
‘Then why?’ Dmitry playfully licked Egor’s fingers, startling him.
‘There must be some solution to this,’ Egor licked his moist fingers in return, making Dmitry ruby. ‘But thinking is not my forte.’
They shared more affectionate and slightly suggestive gestures throughout the day, and eventually Egor fell asleep. Dmitry covered his body with a blanket and put his head on the spot where Egor’s heart was supposed to be, taking in every beat. Dmitry could not believe it. Egor liked him, liked him back. He was not really a bigot, on the contrary, he had given his identity more thought than most people, although he still had to unlearn some things. And he found Dmitry hot. Hot was not how Dmitry would describe himself, but maybe others saw him differently. Desired him differently. But it was time to forget the others. Egor seemed to desire to him, and Dmitry desired him back. Egor was in no condition to do anything, and Dmitry was in no rush. The promise of something did make the wait worth it and supressed the hunger that had been building inside Dmitry. Also, Egor knew that Dmitry was a virgin but had not judged him, having only shown sympathy. Perhaps there was a chance. A chance to discuss the intimate part with Egor and discover what each of them wanted. But it would be a task for another day. Dmitry’s eyes closed, and he fell asleep, his head on Egor’s body.
Dmitry did not remember how he had woken up, but he definitely felt Egor’s hand on his hair, and he wanted to stay in that position for the rest of his life. Unfortunately, someone else was in the vicinity, and Dmitry could see that Egor clearly was not a fan of the visitor judging by the dark shadow on his face. Dmitry smoothly pushed Egor’s hand aside and straightened himself to have a look at whoever had disturbed their peace.
‘I should’ve known you’d be here. I’ve been looking for you everywhere,’ Andrey, because of course it was him, said distraughtly.
Dmitry did not deign to respond to him.
‘Are you still mad at what I said?’ Andrey asked with a softer tone, which still happened to be quite rough.
‘No. I’m mad at you beating up people now,’ Dmitry have him a stink eye.
‘He attacked me first,’ Andrey immediately jumped at self-defence.
‘And yet he’s the one in the infirmary, being refused proper treatment, while you’re running around scot-free. How do you explain that?’
‘He’s a big boy, he’ll recover,’ Andrey said aloofly. ‘And will probably think first next time he wants to throw hands.’
‘Fuck you, Andrey. You’ve grown into such an eblan. Get out of my sight,’ Dmitry said menacingly.
‘Or what?’ Andrey taunted him.
‘Or I’ll…,’ and suddenly Andrey was levitating, his limbs helplessly flailing in the air. Dmitry looked at his arms with a sense of wonder and then made a throwing motion, and Andrey was flung into the wall with a boom. Zhenya, who had been napping at the desk, rose and shone.
‘Boys, if you want to let that testosterone out, do it outside. Tatyana will still kill you, but at least she won’t kill me,’ she grumbled. Everyone ignored her.
‘Did you do that?’ Egor said in awe. ‘Another hidden talent?’
‘More like an extension of the one that’s responsible for destroying everything,’ Dmitry murmured while watching Andrey get back on his feet.
‘You hate me this much, huh?’ Andrey gasped.
‘Still not as much as you hate yourself,’ Dmitry replied condescendingly.
‘Fine. I only came to tell you that the principal is pairing us up starting next week,’ Andrey said hoarsely.
‘You’re kidding. Who’d want to pair up with you after all this?’ Dmitry was ready to spit at Andrey’s face.
‘It’s either this, or be paired up with a girl. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth and take it.’
‘I don’t want to look at the horse, full stop. Especially a nasty one like you,’ Dmitry’s mood was savage.
‘You know what’ll happen when you’re paired up with a girl. If you’re ready to go through that, be my guest,’ Andrey said mysteriously.
‘Why should I be paired up with a girl? I want to be paired up with Egor,’ Dmitry said warily, looking at Egor’s face for reassurance. To his relief, he found it.
‘Yeah, why you or a girl? I agree to be Dmitry’s partner. Tell that to the principal, or we’ll do it ourselves.’
‘Too bad for you, not-a-pretty-boy-anymore, you’ve been selected to pair up with a girl next week, too. The pairs are not decided by the school but by a higher instance, so good luck persuading them,’ there was overt glee in Andrey’s voice, and Dmitry wanted to give him another shove to the wall.
‘Whatever. We’ll work it out. Now get lost, or I’ll send you flying again,’ Dmitry shooed him away.
Andrey did not need more convincing and left. Dmitry watched his departing back with open hostility, his nose releasing air like a bull. Egor hugged him from behind, and Dmitry slowly calmed down.
‘So, a week, huh? And then we’ll have to fight the system?’ Egor remarked cheerfully.
‘I mean, they might pair me up with him, but it doesn’t mean anything. We can just meet in secret or something.’
‘What did he mean by you know what happens with a girl? What will happen?’ Egor suddenly asked, and Dmitry pinched himself for failing to address the elephant in the room.
‘How about… we make the most of the week and forget about his bullshit for the time being?’ Dmitry lowered his head to match Egor’s and looked straight into his eyes, losing himself in the blue.
***
Dmitry visited Egor later on Tuesday, on Wednesday and on Thursday. He ambidextrously managed not to be late for breakfast every time, and Tatyana always looked like someone had poisoned her food. Dmitry took the responsibilities of feeding Egor, accompanying him to the restroom, and changing his clothes. Dmitry pretended to be modest while doing the lattermost, although Egor did not seem to mind Dmitry ogling him. Egor had a cast on his left foot and allowed Dmitry to write some silly messages on it. Dmitry could not think of anything but E+D=L, and he was glad that Egor could not see that. Sometimes they kissed, sometimes Egor let Dmitry leave a hickey on his neck, but they had not gone further than that. Dmitry did not want to take advantage of the injured person and to make his firsts awkward. On Thursday the nurse discharged Egor, probably due to being sick of the lovebirds in her den, and gave him a crutch. Before they could leave, a wild Valera had appeared.
‘Yo, Dima, I haven’t seen you at my private lessons for ages. The lack of audience makes me strive for greatness less,’ he said with fake sulkiness.
‘I’ve been taking care of Egor since no one else seems to… well, care,’ Dmitry said impatiently. ‘I’ll come to the lesson tomorrow.’
‘You can make it up to me by coming to the party tonight. You both are invited,’ Valera winked. ‘Alla will be there. Some older students as well. I think they’re interested in getting to know y’all.’
‘Okay, we’ll be there,’ Egor answered for them. ‘I hope it’ll be better than the previous one.’
‘For sure. We are going to play the seduction game,’ Valera sounded conspirational. ‘And one of you is definitely going to enjoy that.’
‘Um, Valera?’ Dmitry tried to gain his attention. He and Egor had decided to make their relationship known to the table group to avoid awkwardness and gossip. The rest of the school would have to wait. ‘I don’t know what kind of game that is, but it appears that Egor can enjoy the same things as I do.’
He gave Egor a quick kiss, making the guy blush. Valera’s expression was priceless.
‘Wow, you two got close fast. You better tell me all about that tomorrow, Di,’ Valera said with admiration.
‘You can tell Katya but nobody else. I’ll tell Alla myself, I guess, since she was setting me up with someone, and I don’t need that anymore.’
‘You got it. Laters, newlyweds.’
Valera left, and Dmitry and Egor followed. They reached Egor’s room, and Dmitry helped him settle down. There was some kind of correspondence on the cupboard, which Dmitry relayed to Egor. He looked through some of the letters, and his face got stuck in a frown.
‘Anything you should be concerned about?’ Dmitry asked him.
‘Just reminders… and yeah, a notice that I’ll be paired up with a girl next week. Her name’s Marina.’
‘I think I saw her on my ride back. She looked like a typical otaku,’ Dmitry said cautiously.
‘Honestly, I don’t care. I’ll tell her that our relationship is just for a show, maybe she’ll understand. If she doesn’t, well, that’s her problem,’ Egor said, slightly irritated.
‘Good luck. I mean it,’ Dmitry said and touched Egor’s shoulder.
‘Anyway, do you want to do… anything fun?’ Egor sounded suggestive, and Dmitry was about to say yes, but he had a better idea.
‘You know, since we’re going to the party… Maybe we’ll loosen up a bit and then take the things up from there. And I’m curious about that game Valera mentioned,’ Dmitry kept drawing circles on Egor’s shoulders.
‘I guess you’re right. I got all stiff from the stay in the infirmary, and not in the place I want it to be,’ Egor smiled at Dmitry. ‘So loosening up sounds good.’
‘Should I fetch you later?’
‘Yeah, let’s go there together. Our first outing,’ they both laughed.
As promised, Dmitry grabbed Egor at 10 pm, and they both headed to Katya’s room. Dmitry had changed into a semi-fashionable T-shirt and a pair of ripped jeans, while Egor was in a plain black sweater and tight trousers. Egor complimented Dmitry’s bold fashion choices, and Dmitry snorted. Katya welcomed them at the door, commenting on Dmitry’s clothing as well.
‘Loving the ripped jeans and the shaved legs under them! Is that an eyeliner I see? Damn, Dmitry, you’re gonna put those straight guys to shame,’ Katya ohed and ahed approvingly.
‘Just a smidge,’ Dmitry shook his head. ‘Not my fault those boys are too fragile to try it. Would look great on Valera, by the way.’
‘I’ll consider giving him a makeover. Anticipate his transformation next time!’ Katya nodded her head.
‘Looking forward to it,’ Dmitry said and proceeded into the depths of the room. Somehow it was made to feel bigger, and there was enough space for a bar, a mini-pool, and a dancefloor. Everyone was already getting their life to Lada Dance’s Baby Tonight, for which Dmitry also had some appreciation, so he beckoned Egor to follow him.
‘Finally some good fucking food,’ Alla shouted and waved at them from the other side of the dancefloor. ‘Let’s show them how to have real fun.’
Dmitry could only oblige and dance his ass off, intermittently letting Egor grind against him and share touches when no one was looking. For others they appeared as some dumb boys having fun, but Alla gave them occasional thumb ups, and Katya’s smile was more about them being relatively open than anything, or so Dmitry wanted to believe. Valera was more about drinking than dancing, which did not hinder him from coming to the dancefloor and fool around with them, too. The song choices were also surprisingly palatable, as if the DJ had deliberately excluded anything not to Dmitry’s liking. At some point Katya started clapping her hands to draw attention to an important announcement.
‘Okay, so now we’re going to play the seduction game. For those who are in the tank, the rules are simple. We have a team of girls and a team of boys. The girls will do nothing and just stand there at the wall. The boys’ goal is to seduce them, and to do that successfully they’ll have to undress to their underwear and take a dip in the pool. Then they should approach a girl, or girls, it doesn’t matter, and don’t get jealous, people, and try to sweet-talk to her or them. If seduction is successful, a girl should kiss a guy. If it isn’t, she can kick him in the balls. The boy is free to try again until someone gives him a kiss or remain a sore loser for the rest of the night. Are the rules clear?’
There was a commotion in the crowd, with the guys complaining about the game being too sexist and feminist, but Dmitry liked the rules and wondered who had come up with them.
‘I guess I’m going to be one of the girls,’ he said loudly, causing a few gasps.
‘Damn right, you…,’ one of the guys was about to say something totally expected and bigoted, but Alla was quick to kick him in the balls before the game even started.
Dmitry turned to Egor, who had been sweating from all the dancing. While on the dancefloor he had mostly moved his upper body not to put any strain on his leg, but the game did not seem a good fit for him at all.
‘You don’t have to do this,’ Dmitry murmured. ‘And I’m not expecting anything, so just relax.’
‘No, no, I’ll do it. Can’t have some Valeras stealing kisses from you,’ Egor said with determination and quickly took off his sweater and undershirt.
‘I’ll be waiting then, my prince,’ Dmitry said sweetly and took a place at the wall. Other girls were eyeing him unkindly, and the girl who had approached him was among them. She was probably still vexed by his rejection to assist them in the sex ritual, although Dmitry did not want to give her much thought as most guys were already undressed and ready to wet themselves. Some had average bodies, some were on their way to become gym rats, and some had more variety in their body types, which was a welcome addition. Regardless, he was mostly focused on Egor, who slowly heading to the pool, his arm in a sling and his foot in a cast. He was the bravest of them all, and the hottest, even if his body was not in the best shape. He did not even have to seduce Dmitry because his heart had already belonged to him.
Several guys were getting kissed or kicked, and no one dared approach Dmitry or Alla, who had been keeping him a company.
‘They think I’ll turn them gay if they kiss me. Their loss,’ she complained. ‘Gay club parties will always be superior.’
‘I was supposed to meet that guy at one of the clubs, right?’ Dmitry wondered.
‘Yeah, but I see that you don’t need him anymore. Poor thing, he was so excited to meet you,’ Alla lamented.
‘Well, I can still come to the club, right? And we can have some fun without necessarily… you know.’
‘Actually, you’re right. You should come, get to know your people because this joint is definitely not it.’
‘Still kissless?’ Valera interrupted them. ‘What happened to your boyfriend?’
‘Shhh,’ Dmitry rushed to silence Valera. ‘He’s still in the pool.’
‘It’s okay, it’s just a party. What happens at the party stays at the party,’ Valera said ominously and then kissed Dmitry, tongue and all.
‘What the fuck,’ Dmitry exhaled after Valera had let go of his mouth. ‘Wasn’t I supposed to kiss you?’
‘I think you’re already properly seduced by me, so why waste time? You taste sweet, by the way. Sweeter than a maiden,’ Valera licked his lips. ‘I might want a second helping one day.’
‘What… what will Katya say? She’ll murder us both,’ Dmitry flushed and stuttered.
‘Not when she’s the one who suggested this,’ Valera laughed and went to bother the girls.
Meanwhile, Egor was limping back, and Dmitry did not want to think about the damage Valera’s kiss had done to their rookie relationship. However, Egor appeared to be smiling, and not in an ‘I’ll dismember you later for that’ way.
‘Sorry for the wait. I see Valera’s warmed up those lips for me,’ Egor said in a flirty tone.
‘Is that your idea of seduction because I don’t think it will work on me,’ Dmitry said impertinently.
‘What will, then?’ Egor sounded puzzled.
‘Come closer,’ Dmitry commanded, and Egor obeyed.
‘It won’t work because I’m already wet down there,’ Dmitry whispered into Egor’s ear and slipped his tongue into Egor’s mouth.
No one seemed to pay attention to the fact that Dmitry and Egor’s kiss was more than a joke, and they managed to get as much as possible from it. Emboldened by either alcohol or the overall horny situation, a random guy attempted to kiss Dmitry, and Egor reluctantly released him. Dmitry quietly suggested that Egor should kiss some girls, assuring him that he would be fine with that for the sake of Egor’s cover. Another guy gave Dmitry a sloppy kiss and asked him whether he gave blowjobs as well.
‘No,’ Dmitry flinched and pushed the guy aside. ‘Ask that again, and I’ll give you a blow job. The same one Eduard was given.’
The guy immediately scurried away, just in time for Egor to return.
‘Did he give you any trouble?’ he asked with a hint of possessiveness.
‘I’m more likely to give him trouble,’ Dmitry insisted. ‘Anyway, want to get out of here? All these kisses are making me… eager for more.’
‘I was afraid you’d never ask,’ Egor grinned. ‘Let’s move.’
Katya caught them at the door, out of breath and her hair loose.
‘Leaving already? We’re about to play Truth or Dare.’
‘Great party, Katya, but I have to take Egor to his room and, you know… we want to get to know each other. In the Biblical sense,’ Dmitry gave her a shrewd look.
‘Oh. Oh. Of course,’ Katya appeared to have caught Dmitry’s drift. ‘Have fun, guys. Who needs truth or dare when you two are already truthful and daring. Yeah.’
They said their goodbyes, and Dmitry caught a glimpse of Valera, who looked lost against the bedlam. Gone was his earlier confidence, and something seemed to be gnawing at him. Dmitry was sad to leave him in such a state, but Katya would take care of him. And he would take care of Egor. Probably. They made it to Egor’s room with unusual swiftness, both sufficiently aroused. Egor locked the door behind them and looked at Dmitry expectantly, his eyes pure wildness.
‘So, what do you want us to do tonight?’
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feeling is the secret.
the saying "feeling is the secret" is another phrase that neville goddard coined. now, when speaking of "feeling" it to be true, neville did not talk about an "emotion" but rather "knowing" things to be true. but what's so important about "feeling" anyway?
thoughts come from feeling.
your thoughts come from your feeling. to simplify it for you: your feeling can also be reffered to as your belief in something or your state of mind concerning something. therefore, feeling is the cause of thought. first you have a feeling, then you generate thoughts coming from that feeling. your thoughts determine what state you are in or what your underlying belief/feeling is.
change feeling, change self.
your feeling is the root. the origin. the beginning. it's the only thing you need to change in order to see change be reflected back to you. when you do that, you change self — because self, again, is what you feel to be true.
since your thoughts are not the cause of your manifestation but your feeling is, we need to change that first. your feeling or your belief/state is where you think from. it's where thoughts come from automatically. if you change your feeling, your thoughts have no option but to follow in regards to that state.
change the feeling of "i".
how do you change your feeling? in your mind. you don’t change your outer self but your inner self. a belief or a feeling isn't hard to change. there are no blockages of your subconscious, there is no resistance that has to be dealt with. the only reason why you think that there might be obstacles you need to overcome is because you create them in the first place. you yourself are complicating it to change your state and make yourself believe in the difficulty or the idea that your mind needs to be "fixed". but you can uncreate those beliefs the same way you created them.
thoughts hold no power.
since the thought is created, it has no power of its own and no truth in itself. this is why you don't have to worry about thoughts or if you are thinking "good enough", having the "right" thoughts or micromanaging everything. don't try to think perfectly in your mind. the thought is not the root, the feeling is.
that's why "flipping" aka changing thoughts often doesn't do a lot. it does not change your feeling to begin with. and since you keep the feeling, you will also keep reproducing thoughts coming from that state. yes, today you managed to calm down by flipping thought A — but what if you get anxious again tomorrow because you get a thought B?
feeling is the end.
you know the term "live in the end"? this is what we mean we say it: when we want you to live in the end, we want you to feel as if you had your desire. we want you to go to the very end where you have it. we don't want you to worry about the how, the when, the circumstances or the bridge of events. we want you to feel. because once you do, you will also start to think from feeling aka from having your desire. just like edward art said, "change your feeling to what you want to feel. feel everything and the thoughts will come".
just feel it.
you waste so much time not doing what you should be doing. no, you don't need to firmly do sats every night before going to bed and attempt the void and make sure to write down all 100 affirmations in the same order and meditate for exactly 15 minutes... you need to feel. you need to be. you need to experience it in the mind. you need to give yourself the time to just have it. you need to allow yourself to get a taste of it. you have been forcefully and desperately trying to "do to get". just be it for a moment. give yourself the feeling you have been longing for. because you keep feeling what you don't want to, you just end up manifesting things you don't want. and you do things to get and not to change self.
this post was greatly inspired by edward art
with love, ella.
#law of assumption#neville goddard#loassumption#loa#the law of assumption#edward art#manifestation#manifesting#manifest#spiritual#spirituality#manifest it#master manifestor#manifest your dreams#loa tumblr#loablr#manifest your life#manifest your desires#manifest your reality#manifesting it#loa blog#reality shifting#reality shift#shifting#shifting reality#eiypo#imagination creates reality#consciousness is the only reality#loassblog#feeling is the secret
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i know we hate the term "unalive" on tumblr because it's a symbol of the censorship that reigns on tiktok, but consider that it is, for all intents and purposes, the most hilarious word ever.
like im sorry.
you unalived that little shit - come on, peak comedy.
you didn't kill that little shit. you didn't make him die. you didn't inflict mortal wounds upon him.
you just straight up undid his ass. you unlived his life.
you uncreated him. unexisted him. you stopped his past, present, and future.
you unwound him.
it's kinda funny, and mostly siiiick.
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it’s okay ♡
hi lovelies, it’s been a while, but I’m back on here because I want to talk about something.
⚠️ potential tw - domestic abuse
since I’ve been in the LOA community I feel there’s always been this idea that everything said and done was all you as the operant power you created this and you can change it.
this leaves a very blurred line, when do you change someone’s behaviour and when do you choose to leave someone or a situation, knowing the main reason this happened was your assumptions?
not to make this about me because it really isn’t it’s part of some bigger issues, but I’ve been in a domestic abuse situation and currently am and would you really feel okay coming to me or anyone for that matter and tell them oh hun it’s fine, but you created this go uncreate it / it was you : no. You’d make sure they’re physically okay because spoiler alert we still live in the 3D, isn’t that where we want to see our desires eventually? and yes, we are so powerful with our godlike powers, but we are also humans.
I’m grateful that I’ve learned about this law, but I won’t ever make it mean for me that it was all me that this and this happened to me.
I think instead of a teachable moment that would be considered cruel, as it can follow you like guilt. People are still people and even though we are in control of our realities, they still showed up this way and I can hear some people in the back mentally arguing about how I’m in denial but just stop. I am aware of eiypo and how that shapes our lives and the people in it, but you simply cannot make that the end or be all. Would you rather risk someone being hurt stuck in a place full of toxicity trying to affirm their way out of it with stress or take them out first and then work on building them back up¿
When in a situation similar like myself, I urge you to seek safety and make sure you are okay first priority and come back to the law when you’re mentally ready to either change it or use it however you want. You are not your thoughts, you are you and you’re special, so take care and remember: you are loveable 🖤
#law of assumption#void state#neville goddard#eiypo#loa tumblr#shifting blog#shifting community#shiftblr#affirm and persist#manifestation#manifesting#consciousness#affirmations#scripting
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Maybe I should be asking an Orthodox person this, but I do not understand the hubbub with the Filioque. To me it is hair splitting, could you explain why it would not be hairsplitting? Or if there is an aspect I am missing as to why it was the final straw for a schism?
Okay, ah, I think there are two aspects that need to be addressed here. The first deals with the simple fact of its inclusion in the Creed, and I'm going to come off as a traitor here, so let me clarify my personal position; I believe the filioque best represents the reality of the Spirit's procession, but I think it was bad that the Western Church inserted it into the Nicene Creed.
As Henri de Lubac talks about in The Christian Faith, the Church allows for many theologies, spiritualities, customs, and liturgical traditions to coexist; "from one country to another and from one century to another there are many differences in emphasis." What connects all these elaborations and practices of the Christian faith is that they are all anchored in that faith, as revealed by God and distilled in the Creed. That faith is the unity of all Christians everywhere.
And what convinced me that the inclusion of the filioque was not a good move actually came from another Catholic thinker, Karl Rahner, who wrote "the inevitable pluralism met with in theology cannot and must not cause the unity of the creed of faith to disappear from the Church, even in its verbal expression." Except.... that's exactly what the Western Church did. It took the Creed as articulated by two separate ecumenical councils, and unilaterally added words to it. And while there are historical reasons for that inclusion, and while I think the theology behind its inclusion is true, I think modifying what was meant to be the unifying symbol of the Christian faith was not a good move. And I can see why the filioque inclusion seems like a rupture from the Orthodox tradition. Because... we have caused the unity of the creed of faith in its verbal expression to disappear.
And I think that's a bigger problem than the content of the filioque clause itself, to be honest. But, as far as the content goes, let's talk about that, too.
In the Orthodox perspective, the three Persons of the Trinity share a common nature, and there's a kind of symmetry where the traits of any given Person is either held in common by all three, or is reserved for one of Them. So, for example, the state of being uncreated and eternal are traits shared by all Persons in the Trinity, as is the fact that They are almighty and infinite. Those are traits derived from their divine nature. But in terms of traits distinctive to Their individual Personhoods, well: the Father is seen as the Source of the other two, while the Son is the only begotten Member of the Trinity, and the Spirit is the only spirated Member. An Orthodox Christian may argue that the filioque ruins this symmetry of Persons; if the Spirit proceeds from the Father and the Son, the distribution of Personal traits is no longer equal (two Persons have a trait that one Person does not have). This can be seen as a kind of ontological inferiority on the Spirit's end.
From the perspective of the Roman Church and Her western descendants, the articulation of the Trinity doesn't really involve this "common to All or particular to One" logic. Instead, we tend to use a sacramental logic that assumes that how the Persons of the Trinity operate within Their creation also tells us something about how They relate to each other from all eternity. So, the Father sends the Son into the world (John 17:1-4); hence the Father begets the Son. But the Father sends the Holy Spirit to the disciples "in [Christ's] name" (John 14:16-17, 26). So, the Father sends the Spirit, but the Son is somehow involved. The Holy Spirit is believed to still have one origin, but this one origin is the joint act of Father and Son. Part of this may have to do with different starting assumptions. Eastern Christians tend to start their thinking on the Trinity as Three existing in Unity, while Western Christians tend to start their thinking on the Trinity with One existing in Multiplicity.
But this is a super complicated subject, so if someone wants to correct me about either of the perspectives I tried to lay out, please feel free to do so.
#asks#Christianity#Catholicism#Orthodox Christianity#Holy Trinity#God#God the Father#Logos#Holy Spirit#Karl Rahner#Henri de Lubac#Creed
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ARRANGED - Draco M. x Reader PART ONE | “She’ll Do”
You brush your soft hair. Apply a beautiful red shade of lipstick on your even softer lips. You look at yourself in your vanity, the vanity your father built with you when you turned sixteen. You smile at the memory.
Sixteen. Life was so much more simpler, you didn't have the worried you have today at 18. It's crazy how much changes in two years. You take a deep breath in. Today was the day you had been dreading. You and your family are a pure-blood family, and your family intends to keep it that way. Everyone knows your family, everyone. Meaning you have an impossibly high expectation to meet; marry someone you simply don't love. Because you're already in love with someone. Sadly, they don't meet your family's standards. He's half-blooded. You've fought with your parents, multiple times.
"But dad, I love Nicholas!" You beg. Tears burning in your eyes. "Y/N you know how this works. There will be no more arguing. Nicholas is a mud blood."
Mud blood. That's a word that's often thrown around in conversations in your household. Most witches and wizards today will turn in your direction in disbelief/disgust when it's used. But your family doesn't care.
You finish with the rest of your makeup. Today you were going to meet your future husband. The one that's been arranged and assigned to you. Your eyes gaze to an old photograph of you and Nicholas, at the Yule Ball. Tears form in your eyes again. You pick up the photograph gently with your fingers, handling it like fragile glass.
"I promise, Y/N. I will wait for you." Nicholas said, smiling faintly. You couldn't even look him in the eye when your parents refused to let him marry you, and the news broke out about your arranged marriage. "Nicholas, I am so sorry." You sob out. "Hey," he says softly, his hand rubbing your shoulder, the other gently grabbing your chin pulling your face in the direction of him. "It will be okay, Y/N. I love you, we will make it through this." He consoles you.
Nicholas promised you that you’d both somehow figure out a way to be together. You wanted to show him that you were hopeful, but deep down you were aware of what your family is capable of.
Not just your family, but the family you’re being married into. The Malfoy’s. You were marrying their son, Draco.
You and Draco had attended Hogwarts together, the same house, same classes, played Quidditch together on the Slytherin team, but no matter how much coincidental time you spent together; your beliefs could never be the same.
“Y/N, imagine how disappointed your father would be with you if he knew you were still dating that foul mud blood, Nicholas.” Draco would tease you as he saw you and Nicholas holding hands walking down the hall. “Well, you make your father disappointed without even trying, don’t you, Malfoy?” Nicholas would spit back. “Nicholas, he’s not worth it.” You’d whisper.
“Y/N! Are you ready?” You heard your mother call. Almost time. “Almost!” You call back. “Well hurry up, you can’t take all day!”
You sigh. You finish your hair by putting it up in an elegant bun with a hair clip uncreated with diamonds, and added hair spray for support. Your dress was long, and elegant. Dark green with lace around her neck line. Your collar bones poked out with your long necklace in the middle, that matches your hair clip. You were ready, for the worst day of your life.
﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋
You come down the steps of in your opinion, oversized house. Your mom greets you at the bottom. She gasps and he hand covers her mouth. “Oh Y/N.. You look beautiful. Draco will simply melt when he sees you.”
“Gross.” Your mutter in annoyance. ��Melvins Beard, Y/N get over yourself! This is for the good of not only the family, but you!” Your mother stressed. “For me? I have already found the love of my life! But he didn’t fit your standards! So I am being forced to marry someone I have no interest in even being friends with!” You blurt out. Your mother just stares at you. If smoke could burst out of her ears, it would.
“Y/N. This is how our family works. This is your life. You were born into the family, and this is the life and rules you live by as a member of this family. Your father and I were arranged.”
“And how did that turn out? You’re both home together all the time but don’t say a single word to each other! You have nothing in common.”
“We created you. We continued to build the empire together. We love each other.” Your mother insisted.
“You’re in denial.” You said finally.
You and your mother left your manor to meet your father, who had already arrived at the Malfoys. "Y/N, before we go in there, please develop an open mind." Your mother said while gently grabbing your hand. "Me have an open mind?" You responded. "I told you the love of my life, and he wasn't good enough for YOU." you say with a harsh tone. Without giving her the chance to respond, you left the car. You walk up to the Malfoy manner. It is so gloomy, almost like a dark cloud is hanging above it. The whole exterior is a pitch black color, the gate to the manor looks terrifying, like the house where you'd accidentally kick your ball into the yard, and wouldn't dare to get it back.
You take a deep breath. Apart of you was scared, another was angry. Either emotion was to not to be shown. A guard goes up to the gate.
"Name?" The man asks, his face covered with his hood. All you can see is his goatee that comes to a point.
"Y/F/N." You huff out, crossing your arms from the cold.
"Congratulations on the marriage, future Mrs. Malfoy." The guard says to you, his yellowing teeth form into a smile. You roll your eyes. The guard opens the gate for you, allowing you to enter. You walk up to the manor, down a long runway. Each side were tall hedges, to hide whatever they hid around their home. You could feel anxiety bubbling in your stomach. You know Voldemort would hide out here from time to time. Yes, the one who shall not be named, has probably walked down the same runway you are right now.
You arrive to the Malfoy’s front door, and knock. Narcissa answers and smiles. “Y/N. The pleasure is mine; welcome to our home.” She said gracefully. Admittedly, Narcissa was beautiful. Her white and black hair, strategically done up together. He bright red lips pop against her pale white skin. “Thank you madam.” You said, bowing at her. You enter in the manor.
“I’ve been told you’re not a fan of the arrangement.” Narcissa says simply, closing the door behind you, then turning towards you.
You sigh. You’re tired of explaining yourself to people who won’t listen. “It’s nothing against Draco personally, but Narcissa- I’ve already met my love.”
“Y/N, how are your parents? They were arranged I’m sure you know.” Narcissa asked, faintly smiling at you.
“They don’t talk. They don’t love each other, married for blood status.” You explained.
“Yes, you see, me and Lucius are the opposite. We love each other. We married for blood status. We were arranged,” Narcissa started. “Correct me if I am wrong, but even when people marry the person they ‘love’ they still divorce, and Lucius and I are an example of an arranged marriage that has turned out lovely.”
You stare at Narcissa. Nothing she said really made you feel better; nor make sense. “Mrs. Malfoy. You and Lucius have the same beliefs, same meaning of life, everything. Draco and I have nothing in common-“
“Did someone say my name?” A voice from the half to the right of you calls. You and Narcissa turn towards the direction of the voice. Draco Malfoy himself comes out of the hall. He stops to look at you, does not react, and continues to walk towards you.
“I guess she’ll do, mother.” He said matter of factly. Narcissa narrowed her eyes at her blonde haired son. “Of course she’ll do, Draco. She’s beautiful.” Draco shrugged.
You scoffed. “I did not spend hours getting ready for a man who I have no interest in marrying just for you to say ‘she’ll do.’” You spit at him.
“She’s sassy.” Draco said, ignoring you. “On we go then,” he added, motioning for you both to follow him to the ball room. Your jaw dropped as you watched him walk off. “Ignore him, he’s not a morning person.” Narcissa said nervously. “Let’s go, dear.” She said after a moment, putting her arm around yours.
You and Narcissa arrive in the ballroom. Lucius and your father are talking near the Malfoy’s thrones. Your father looks at you; and smiles. Your expression doesn’t change from your blank one.
Draco turned around, facing you. He held his hand out, as an offer. You take a deep breath and take it.
He brings you close. “Meet me in the dining area in 10 minutes.” He whispers. You look at him with an eyebrow raised. He gives you a smug look. “Don’t worry darling, I’m not interested in you like that quite yet.” He said, as if he was reading your mind.
“Y/N. Come see Lucius, and where is your mother?” Your father asks. You shrug, and walk up to the men. “I’m not sure, I left her in the car, I’m sure she’ll be here in a moment.” You say, then turn to Lucius. You bow. “Mr.Malfoy.” you greet him.
“Y/N. It’s a pleasure, my dear.” He says in his monotone voice. “Draco is a lucky man, I must say.” Lucius says, eyeing you up and down. You suddenly feel yourself stepping closer to your father. “Yes, she looks just like her mother.” Your dad says nervously. His hand protectively lands on your shoulder.
“You’ll be staying with the Malfoy’s after the wedding, Y/N. Learning how they live; then hopefully, you and Draco will be able to live on your own.” Your father explained to you. You nodded. “You’ll have a choice of our many manors, Y/N. Although, I’m sure Draco already has one in mind that he’s picked.” Lucius added.
“This is crazy. I don’t even want to be in the same room as anybody from the Malfoy family. And now I’ll have to live with them? Nobody told me.” You thought. You then suddenly remember your meeting with Draco. “If you two gentlemen will excuse me, I need to use the ladies room.” You say, smiling at them both. They both nod, and you go off to find the kitchen.
It took a while, but you found it. Draco, dressed in an all black suit with a slytherin pin, his platinum blonde hair, leaning against the counter.
“You’re late.”
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